Erotic Museum where Naughty Dreams Come True

The Erotic Museum, where your naughty dreams come true, is located where you would expect it: in the heart of the Red Light District. The red neon light over the entrance beckons you from afar. The museum showcases the history of erotica. Its five floors are chock-a-block with erotic and often surprising art.

Erotic Museum Almost like a Traditional Museum

The first floor is almost like a proper art museum with glass cases and cabinets displaying art. The only difference between general art and art in this museum is that all carvings, statuettes and figurines are of men with exceptionally large, long or fat phalluses. One entire wall is devoted to John Lennon’s lithographs, his wedding present to Yoko.

The Grotto Surprise

The next room is decorated as a grotto. On first sight it looks like scenes from Disney movies. When looking closer, you will notice that every depicted male sports gigantic erections and every female is blessed with watermelon-sized boobies. Even the bunnies are sexually roused as they frolic about, all humping each other. This is not all, sit down on one of the toadstools and watch the Walt Disney cartoons that prove to be hard porno.

Erotic Museum: Interactive Displays

The erotic postcards and books may look quite dull after the Walt Disney experience, skim through them and continue to the next floor. A mannequin wearing lace lingerie and garters solicits from behind her window, push a button and you will hear commentary in various languages. If this is not exciting enough, pick up one of the phones and listen to phone sex.

The Higher you Get the Less Conventional the Displays

The higher you climb the less conventional the museum gets. Here is what you would expect to find in an erotic museum! The entire floor is devoted to fetisism, S&M, bondage and the like. Mannequins do naughty things to each other. Watch the black-and-white video of Betty’s antics. The rest of this floor is devoted to take your own picture, in a bondage chair, next to a giant penis, or what about your life-size picture as two S&M outfitted people with cut-out faces. Take a selfie with your partner and put it on your bedside table as a memento or perhaps a reminder.

Come with a relaxed attitude towards sex and you will not be disappointed. You are in the Red Light District and a visit to the Erotisch Museum is part of the Amsterdam experience.

Getting there

The Erotic Museum located in the Red Light District and a 10-minute walk from Amsterdam Central Station

Address: Erotic Museum, Oudezijds Achterburgwal 54, Amsterdam

Sunday – Thursday 11.00-01.00
Friday and Saturday 12.30-02.00

The museum is adults only, minors are not allowed in the museum

photos Marianne Crone